Grey
by jeano
Summary: [PreNaruto] Ever wondered about Kakashisensei's life story?
1. Prologue

**Grey**

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Disclaimer: Naruto and its related characters belong to Kishimoto Masashi. 

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**Prologue **

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The Raikage walked towards the clearing in the depths of the forest that he knew so well. This very clearing had been his favourite haunt since he was a teenager, and it remained so even after he got married to a woman whom his parents chose. 

The primary reason why he loved this place so was the privacy it offered. No one knew of this haunt of his, and so this was the place which contained every one of his secrets. Only the leaves and branches bore witness to whatever he did here. Today, yet another secret would be revealed to the leaves, whispering in the warm summer breeze. 

Moving his hands in a series of complicated seals, the Raikage performed a forbidden jutsu and summoned the notorious Kyuubi, the nine-tailed demon fox. Anxiously he waited for the fox to appear, but nothing happened. He was sure that he had performed the seals correctly, but doubts began to creep into his mind. 

The Raikage repeated the seals. This time, in a puff of red smoke, the Kyuubi towered before him, its aura of anger and hatred a fiery yet beautiful halo. Yes, this was what he wanted--the beautiful yet monstrous creature that produced massive amounts of chakra. For so many years he had tried to seek it out from its obscure hiding place, and now that he had managed to meet it face to face, he almost regretted doing so. 

"What do you want?" A deep voice rumbled from the large fox's chest. He was clearly irritated, and the Raikage tried hard to stand his ground in front of the creature at least 1000 times his size, but faltered. He took a few steps backwards, awed by the magnificence of the awesome yet terrifying creature before him. 

The fox was rust-coloured, with red beady eyes. It had nine long tails, which were swishing about idly. The power of the Kyuubi was evident from the amount of damage it was causing just by whipping its tails about. The Raikage just stood there amidst the falling trees, pondering what to do with the destructive fox. He knew that the Kyuubi was no ordinary summoning creature, and hence would be difficult to handle. 

All the same, he had been prepared for such trouble. He fished a scroll out of his cloak and offered it to the Kyuubi. The Kyuubi stared at it suspiciously, squinting at the crisp new scroll. The Raikage then proceeded to smear his name in blood onto the scroll. It was all up to the Kyuubi now. 

The Kyuubi allowed a small sneer to cross his face before using his chakra to engrave his name onto the scroll. 

With the unspoken pact sealed in blood and chakra, the demon fox vanished, leaving the Raikage standing in the forest clearing, fallen trees around him. 

The only sign of the agreement between the Raikage and the Kyuubi was the scroll clutched tightly in the Raikage's hand, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth.


	2. Chapter 1

**Grey**

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Disclaimer: Naruto and its related characters belong to Kishimoto Masashi. 

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**Chapter 1**

I fell, hard, to the dusty ground and wheezed as a cloud of dust was stirred up by my fall. My lungs felt like they were on fire. My limbs were already numb, which was rather expected. After all, I was only four, and I had been training really hard for over a week, only stopping to rest when it was time to eat or sleep. Life as the son of the Raikage was hard. 'Tousan's expectations of me were sky-high, and with my enrolment with our village's Ninja Academy, I was forced to give up my play-time with my peers for a rigorous training regime. All this was for the sake of 'tousan's reputation as the all-supreme Raikage.

'Tousan glared at me out of the corner of his eye--a sign of his displeasure. I attempted to drag myself to my knees, but twice my efforts were in vain. Spent, I collapsed to the ground once again, sobbing and choking on the dust that had been stirred up.

Disappointed that I was too weak to even get to my feet, 'tousan walked towards me slowly, his face distorted with anger. He stopped right in front of me, and I continued kneeling in front of him, staring at his boots with an almost morbid fascination.

In a haze, I sensed one of his boots flying up towards my face. I tried to dodge with what little strength I could muster, but my reaction was too slow, my body already drained. I felt his leather shoe hit me squarely in the face, and then sensed myself flying through the air from the impact. It was a rather vague, dreamy feeling, for I was very close to losing consciousness. 

The pain only kicked in when I landed several metres away on the ground, and I felt the distinctive coppery taste of blood in my mouth, which hung on my parched lips and lingered for a long while afterwards in my mouth. I trembled violently, biting my lips in a desperate effort to prevent myself from crying out loud from the pain that attacked me ruthlessly.

I lifted my head, only to see 'tousan looming angrily over me. Terrified at the possible consequences of his wrath, I made several more attempts to stand, but my knees defied me, and I fell to the ground, sobbing without restraint, my tears mixing with the pools of blood on the ground.

At this point in time, 'tousan came towards me, his face an unreadable mask. Afraid of what was to come, I cringed as he knelt before me, and staunchly avoided eye contact with him.

After a while, I looked almost expectantly up at him, after he had not administered the punishment deemed fit for the useless brat I was. Blood was still trickling down my nose, and my nose was blocked and dripping mucus. I could barely see 'tousan's expression through my tears, but I felt that he would be very disappointed with my mediocre performance.

Terrified, I began kowtowing to him, repeatedly mumbling apologies, praying for forgiveness, and swearing by the gods that I would try harder the next time.

I heard the wind whiz past my ear and shut my eyes in anticipation of the resounding slap that he had given me. Right then, I knew that my apologies had been ignored. 'Tousan said sternly, "Summon at least three ninken successfully by the end of tomorrow. If you fail, you will have no food until the end of the week."

Not knowing how to react to that, I knelt there speechless, and listened to his footsteps die away into the distance.

*****

Once he had gone, I rolled onto my side wearily and started sobbing uncontrollably. My heart felt heavy and I felt a great sense of helplessness as I knew that it was virtually impossible to be able to master the high-level ninjutsu within 24 hours.

Moreover, much as I enjoyed training to become a ninja, I also wanted some time to myself, so that I could have some time to myself or play.

I don't have friends, and it's not like I'm antisocial or anything. According to 'tousan's law, everyone was to stay away from me. When I cried about it in the past, he kept telling me that it was for my own good, and that I wouldn't miss out on anything by mixing with those commoners.

However, the forbidden fruit tastes best, so I once sneaked out of our house without my Jounin bodyguard and went for a walk in the village. Much to my disappointment, most of the people avoided me, and there was much finger-pointing at my back.

Hence, I would often be lying on the ground, worn out from training, picturing the people on the street all staring at me and avoiding me. A sudden rush of emotion would bring tears to my eyes, and they would roll down my grimy cheeks and onto the ground. And all this while, I would be dreaming of the day when I could run towards a group of children my age and join them in their games, letting my excited squeals mingle with theirs. 

I knew that was just an empty dream, but I continued to keep my hopes high despite the knowledge that normalcy was impossible to achieve. I would always dream of the day when I could go wherever I wanted without being tailed by those irritating Jounin bodyguards. They kept nagging at me not to climb trees or play with fire, simply because their lives would be at stake if 'tousan found me injured while in their care. 

True, 'tousan cared a lot for me, as I can see from his actions, but he just wasn't the sort to express his feelings in words. Moreover, he had a very nasty temper, and was known all over the village for his ruthlessness. Despite that, I still loved him, and I always looked forward to the times when we would have dinner together, laughing and joking about how bad 'kaasan's cooking was.

However, although 'tousan was relatively civil towards 'kaasan and I, he treated his underlings like dirt; there were several apparent cases of betrayal every month. 'Tousan ruled the village with an iron fist, but despite this, corruption was rampant and crime rates were high due to the widespread poverty that had stricken our village.

*****

I combined my mental and physical energies, and threw the scroll stained with my blood into the air. I then proceeded to perform several complex seals, and then caught the scroll between my thumbs and index fingers. "Ninpou summoning! Earth element, tracking fang no jutsu!"

The ground shook violently and several large cracks appeared on the surface of the barren, dusty ground. 'Tousan stood where he was, his senses on high alert. When the four ninken emerged from the ground under his feet, he struck at them but missed, and was pinned to the ground.

At this point, 'tousan called off the "match" and beamed proudly at me. I released the jutsu, and wobbled dangerously on my feet, watching dark patches dance before my eyes until I finally lost my balance and fell into a pair of strong arms that were there to catch me.

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A/n: This fanfiction was done for a school project with my friend, yume.

Credits: yume (storyboarding), kakashi (beta-reading) and Hannshuin (beta-reading)

Since this is supposed to be an illustrated fanfiction, there will be a site with the pictures accompanying the fic. I'll put up a link when the site's done.

Meanwhile, enjoy the fic ^^


	3. Chapter 2

**Grey **

**Chapter 2 **

I glanced over my shoulder at the group of jounins trailing behind me and frowned. It wasn't as though having a group of bodyguards following me was something new; in fact it was already an integral part of my life.

I turned around, hands on my hips, and pouted. "Could you all please leave me alone for just ten minutes? I promise I won't run away. I'll be in that alley over there." I pointed at a dark and dingy alleyway to my right. 

The squad leader said mechanically, "No. Orders from Raikage-sama."

"Come on, I won't eat a cockroach or anything. I'm four, and Raikage-chama says I'm of at least Genin level." I stood up as tall as I could and glared at the rather flustered jounin, who eventually spoke, "Uh, then could you at least tell us what you'd be doing there?"

I rolled my eyes and complained, "You guys are supposed to be one of the best ninjas around, aren't you? Have you lost your sense of direction? This is the very alley we were in yesterday, and I'm going in there _alone _so you all won't have to snigger about the way I feed a puppy." 

I stopped, out of breath, and glared at them indignantly. It hadn't escaped my attention that they were laughing at the way I crooned to the filthy grey puppy that I had adopted as my own. I didn't dare to take it home for fear of facing the wrath of 'tousan for wasting my time on a stupid dog. 

I could see that the jounins were rather stunned, and I took this chance to run off into the alley. Although they knew that they could catch up with me easily, they left me alone, and prayed with their lives that I would be safe and sound. 

*****

"Pochi! Pochi! Where are you?" It was filthy in the alley, and large ferocious rats scampered around in the shadows.

In response to my call, Pochi crawled out from behind an overturned trash can, whimpering pitifully. Its left foreleg was bleeding, and I guessed that it was caused by one of those disgusting rats. It was difficult to fathom how a weak and vulnerable puppy like Pochi could survive in such unfavourable conditions. Oh, how I ached to bring him home! However, due to 'tousan's restrictions, I could not do so, and hence had to continue feeding him as often as I possibly could. 

I dug around in my pocket and found the small slice of bread I had brought along especially for Pochi. I offered the bread to Pochi, who gobbled it down eagerly. As I was looking through my pockets for more food, I heard a back door open, and footsteps followed. There seemed to be two people, and I caught a whiff of alcohol coming from their direction. Not wanting to be involved in a drunken brawl, I picked Pochi up and ducked behind a garbage bin. 

I held my breath as the footsteps drew closer, and held the squirming Pochi close, as I prayed to the gods that I wouldn't be discovered. 

The footsteps stopped, and I heard a drowsy voice say, "Jiro, what was it you wanted to tell me?"

In between hiccups, the other person said, "It's top *hic* secret. You mustn't tell anyone... *hic* I heard that Konoha is developing a forbidden *hic* jutsu. Apparently, it *hic* enables the user to bring the *hic* dead back to life..." 

I sat up, ears wide open to whatever secrets these drunk men were about to reveal. 

"Isn't Konoha the village we have a verbal treaty with?" 

"Yeah. And by doing *hic* this, they have violated the terms *hic* of the treaty. If Raikage-sama gets to *hic* know about this, there may be a *hic* war..."

The two drunkards then proceeded to wail about their families, about the country, about the economy and just about everything else that was wrong in their lives. One of them gagged and was sick into a trash can. The smell of vomit filled the air. I felt a faint sense of nausea wash over me, not because of the stench that hung in the air, but because I was afraid of the possibly impending war. 

Once the men had left, I made for the main road as quickly as I could after putting Pochi down, and was met by the familiar, comforting sight of my jounin bodyguards. 

*****

I climbed up the tree near the edge of the cliff, watched by the hawk-eyed Anbu squad that had been marked out to protect me. I settled myself on a thick bough and leaned against the rough trunk. This was the spot where I passed the time when I wasn't training. I had grown up with this tree, and its leafy branches offered me a cool and comforting shade for me to sit in. This time was no different, except that I was greatly troubled. 

I wondered if I should tell 'tousan about the conversation I had overheard in the alley. Logically, I should, but that could lead to a war, and hence cause further damage to our country's resources and economy. However, I refused to allow this matter go to rest, for the village was endangered greatly by this forbidden jutsu, which could possibly bring past ninjas to life. 

After much consideration, I realised that no matter which choice I made, the village, my home, would still suffer the consequences of a devastating war. If we waged war on Konoha, we would still keep our honour even if we lost the war. On the other hand, it would be greatly humiliating to be caught unprepared and be ravaged by the shinobis of Konoha. 

With that in mind, I hopped off the branch and ran to 'tousan's official quarters. 

When I reached the Raikage's headquarters, I was told by the chuunin on guard duty that an emergency meeting was in progress, and hence I was not to interrupt under any circumstances.

So I sat on the steps outside 'tousan's quarters, waiting impatiently for the meeting to conclude. My jounin bodyguards followed suit, and sat beside me on the steps. Despite being ordered to be my bodyguards and not nannies, they did not hesitate to keep me entertained with jokes, stories and riddles as we waited for 'tousan to come out. 

At long last, I saw the village elders and jounins filing out of the meeting hall. Last of all came 'tousan, and I ran to him and flung my arms around his thigh and buried my face in his warm stomach. In response, he patted my head gently.

"Good timing, Kurai-chan. I was just about to send for you."

I glanced up at 'tousan, a questioning look on my face. "Why were you about to send for me?"

"Because, my good son, you have been chosen to go on a mission to Konoha."

My eyes widened as I realised that I was going to be sent onto enemy ground. Caught by surprise, I nearly forgot to tell 'tousan about what I had overheard from the drunken men in my shock and excitement. 

After I had finished telling him about Konoha and the forbidden jutsu, he smiled proudly at me, and told me that I was a good ninja, always subservient to my superiors. He also told me that he had known this for quite a long time already, and that he had thought very hard about the possible solutions to this threat. 

And the solution was to send me over to spy on Konoha, and check the movements of their ninjas. 'Tousan told me that the village council had chosen me because I was a young and innocent child, and there was a chance that they would let their guard down when dealing with me. Moreover, I was also an unofficially trained ninja, and this would make me all the more viable as a spy since they could not check up on me. 

As a result, over the next few days, I was given a new identity, and was told to tell a flawless sob story to whoever found me. 

And hence, with such preparations, I bade a tearful goodbye to my family, and armed with some supplies, set off on my first mission ever. 

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A/n: Thanks to those who reviewed ^^ The reviews really gave me an ego boost ^^ Thanks again!! 


	4. Chapter 3

**Grey**

**Chapter 3 **

I collapsed, worn and starving, on the sodden path. The terrain had changed drastically since I left my homeland, and although I had traveled on horseback up to the border, the journey before me was still long and arduous. Moreover, hungry beasts and poisonous plants yet unknown to me lurked along the roads I took, making my journey all the more treacherous and challenging. Even though I had known long ago that every mission I undertook could result in death, I always took it for granted that Death itself would never come knocking on my door. 

I struggled to stand, but my arms and legs were completely useless, and it was with a heavy heart that I realised that I could not go on anymore. 

As I lay limply on the ground, I fought to remain conscious and felt for my precious water bottle--it was empty. Robbed of all hope, I lay on the ground, and felt myself fall into the deep chasm of darkness.

*****

I awoke in a strange bed in an unfamiliarly bare room. The mask I had been wearing earlier on had been removed, and was lying on the bedside table to my right. The room was sparsely decorated, and the paint on the cream coloured walls was peeling in many places. A young man with blonde, spiky hair sat in a battered wicker chair, asleep and snoring. Not knowing where I was, I began to cry. 

The young man in the chair--he looked no more than eighteen years old--started out of his chair the moment he heard me sobbing pitifully. He ran about the room and tried to dig out toys which he didn't have, and even sang a ditty in an effort to lull me to sleep. However, all this was in vain, for I was reminded of 'kaasan when he started singing her favourite song, and started bawling immediately.

Eventually, he gave me some cup ramen and tried to feed me in order to pacify and silence me. I gave in to his cooing and let him deliver the half-cooked noodles into my mouth. 

After I had finally stopped sobbing, and was silently savouring the salty aftertaste of the ramen, he finally asked, as gently as he could, "Kid, where're you from? Where are your parents?" 

I let a wave of homesickness wash over me again, and once again, tears rolled down my grimy cheeks. I sobbed uncontrollably, and was unable to speak for quite a while. Meanwhile, the young man was staring at me sadly, with sky blue eyes that seemed to empathise with my unspoken past. He seemed to be at a loss as to how to handle the situation, but still tried his best to comfort me, patting my back as gently as he could. 

After I had calmed down somewhat, and my sobbing had subsided to the occasional sniffle, he attempted asking me again, "What's your name, kid? And where do you come from?"

I sniffled, and managed to choke out, "I'm Hatake Kakashi from a small farm in the north. It was raided by Anbu from Hidden Cloud Village... They killed Kenji-niichan, and... and... Otousan and Okaasan... "

The man didn't say anything, but drew me into a hug. I suppressed the urge to smirk at his gullibility, and instead opened the floodgates once more. It wasn't easy to play the part of a poor, lost and innocent boy, and it was vital that he didn't see through my act. 

*****

I woke up, screaming and crying, in the middle of the night, and the man--Uzumaki Hayato, was by my side in an instant to comfort me, to reassure me that everything was all right, that it was only a dream. He was rather unsure of how to console me, but tried his best anyway. 

Cooing gently to lull me to sleep, he began telling me a tale about a king and his dragon, and I listened drowsily as I slipped into a deep slumber. 

*****

Weeks passed, and it was finally time for Hayato-niichan and I to leave the shabby hut that served to house him while he trained in the depths of the forest. 

I'd learnt quite a good deal about him during that short span of time I'd known him. He was 18, and had recently passed the jounin exam. He also helped me get over my 'trauma' pretty well, since he'd witnessed the brutal murder of his cousin by a street gang while he watched, terrified and helpless. 

He never asked any more questions about my past, and learnt only what I volunteered, for fear of evoking the pain that supposedly flowed through me at the very mention of my parents. On the other hand, I, knowing my place as a child, did not venture to ask him any personal questions for fear of offending my newfound guardian.

Surprisingly, Hayato-niichan let me watch him train, thinking that it would probably distract me from thinking about the brutal tragedy that had stricken my family because of a simple act of goodwill. In any case, it gave me a good excuse to join the Konoha ninja school, if there was one. 

"Hayato-niichan... I'd like to become a shinobi when I grow up." My voice was muffled by the fabric of the mask. Moreover, since he was leaping from branch to branch in the treetops with me on his back, the wind very nearly blew my words away, but he heard me surely enough. 

"Hm, really? That's great! But why?"

"The power you showed when you were training was awesome. I'd like to become a shinobi as strong as you are so that I can take revenge." I gritted my teeth in determination. 

"No, actually I was showing off... Haha..." Hayato-niichan chuckled, in a bid to lighten the mood. But I knew that he sensed my determination, and was quite sure that he would take me to the Konoha ninja school later. 

As expected, Hayato-niichan took me to a block of flats, which he introduced as the Konoha Ninja Academy. It was evidently break time, since there were many children running about in the grassy yard in the school grounds. When they saw me enter the grounds, clutching Hayato-niichan's hand, they stopped to stare at me, and I clung to Hayato-niichan, being unused to such an awkward situation. I was more used to being ignored than being paid attention to, even in my own village. 

The children greeted Hayato-niichan half-heartedly, distracted by my presence. He grinned at them cheerily, but continued to lead me into the school building. 

He introduced me to an amiable old man, whom he said was the Sandaime Hokage. The Hokage then asked me a few things about myself, including the reason behind my desire to become a ninja, then led me to a room where a diagnostic test would be held. 

I gulped. Would I be able to pass the test, and yet not reveal anything about the training I had received prior to this? 

*****

The test was over in a flash, and soon I was standing in front of all my new classmates. Thankfully, the test was simply a fistfight with one of the chuunins, so I managed to cover up pretty well by punching around quite senselessly while trying to bring out my apparent determination. However, the Hokage commented on my 'astounding speed', and I feared for an instant that he would smell a rat. Thankfully, he only said that I had a lot of potential as a ninja, and let Hayato-niichan take me to my classroom. 

There was a collective murmuring when I entered the classroom with Hayato-niichan, who had inevitably become my self-appointed guardian. I recognised several faces from earlier on, but avoided making eye contact with anyone. I drew a circle on the dusty floor using the toe of my left sandal, while I nervously introduced myself to the class. I had never been asked to speak before so many people before. After all, I was largely ignored in my village, and hence never had to deal with being the centre of attention. 

I was asked to take a seat, and naturally, I went to the back of class, not wanting to feel many pairs of eyes boring into the back of my head. The other occupant of the long bench was a boy wearing a pair of snorkel goggles. He smiled at me and said, "Hey I'm Sarutobi Asuma. I guess we'll be bench mates for a long while, ne Kakashi? Yoroshiku ne." He grinned at me, and I smiled back at him through my mask, which covered half my face. 

I sighed, and looked out the window, as the teacher launched into a lengthy speech on the importance of chakra control. Perhaps it was good to have come to Konoha after all... 

A/n: Once again, I'd like to thank all you reviewers! It is very encouraging to see that my fic has been appreciated XD

Bronze Eagle Sorry for taking so long to reply XP The Raikage is the head of Hidden Cloud Village. 

Bishiehuggler Thanks for the suggestion, but we still need a separate site because that will be our end product for our project. ^^

Blinkie The Raikage is the narrator's father. And " 'tousan " is short for Otousan, which means "Father"


	5. Chapter 4

**Grey**

**Chapter 4**

It was rather boring at the Konoha Ninja Academy, as it was called. Other than learning new techniques, there wasn't very much that I had to learn since I had already mastered the art of chakra control and the basics like Bunshin no Jutsu, which was universally the same throughout the different ninja countries. 

However, in order to make myself look more like a struggling ninja wannabe, I controlled my chakra such that it would be insufficient to perform the jutsu learnt. However, it was difficult to control my impatience, and hence I was often the fastest learner in the class.

This came with its price, for many of my classmates were jealous of my outstanding ability, and largely disregarded my presence. I took no note of their childish behaviour, for I was already used to being ignored. What irked me was how several of them would sometimes gang up, and challenge me to a fight. Of course, I would win effortlessly, but I didn't realise that my victories only served to make them hate me even more. 

*****

My mask was the target of ridicule among my classmates. Whenever I walked past Soichiro, Wakamaru and Ryutaro, they would snigger, and make some caustic remark about my masked face. I ignored them of course, hoping they would lose interest. It worked, and after a few weeks, they gave up taunting me, and found their new victim in a girl shorter than average. 

"Hey, shortie. How's the air down there?" Soichiro smirked, and then the three boys laughed raucously, while the poor girl hung her head.

The rest of the class was silent, as the bullies' laugher echoed in the room. No one dared to speak up, as these three boys were the oldest and biggest in the class. Everyone stared at the crying girl helplessly, and silently prayed that the bully trio wouldn't beat her up just for kicks. 

I watched the whole incident in silence, not knowing what exactly to do. I knew for sure that I could easily beat those three to a pulp, but since I had never encountered such a situation, I didn't know how to approach those bullies without looking idiotic. Perhaps I could play a trick on them, but how?

Just as I was pondering my next move, Asuma prodded me with a finger. "Ne, Kakashi, aren't you going to beat them up? I mean, just look at poor Tsukika... You're just about the only person in class who can save her..." 

I looked at him, and it was only then that it hit me that everyone else was looking to me, hoping that I could help them solve the problem. 

I stood up importantly, and made my way towards the bully trio. They still surrounded the poor, sobbing girl. They were so absorbed in taunting her that they didn't notice me approaching. 

I kicked Wakamaru from behind, causing him to stumble and fall heavily onto the ground. The other two bullies turned to glare angrily at me, and I returned their malevolent gaze with an icy stare. 

We continued glowering at one another for quite a while, and the class was silent with anticipation. I could feel many pairs of eyes trained on us, and I didn't care. 

'Tousan's instructions not to draw attention to myself were swept to the back of my mind, as I lunged forward and threw a hard punch at Soichiro. 

In no time, I was in a full-blown fight with those three bullies, and the class cheered us on, eagerly watching me beat the trio to a pulp. 

Unfortunately for us, the ruckus drew a passing Jounin's attention, and we were severely reprimanded by him. I received the worst scolding because the other three were very badly injured, while I escaped with only a few scratches. 

*****

"Anou... Thanks for saving me just now..." The vertically challenged girl from earlier on blushed, as she expressed her gratitude to me in the schoolyard. I smiled through my mask and mumbled, "No problem." 

Not knowing what to do after that, I decided to go home rather than stare at her and twiddle my thumbs awkwardly. 

As I turned around, she called out again to me, "Anou... Kakashi-san, why do you always wear that mask?"

I stopped in my tracks, somewhat bewildered by the strange and unexpected question. I cocked my head sideways such that I could see her without turning around. Tsukika was looking at me earnestly, and then with sincerity in her voice, she asked another strange question, "Kakashi-san, why don't you ever play with us?"

The only thought that popped into my head right then was, _she's weird. Why does she ask me such strange questions?_

I frowned a little, slightly offended by her question. It seemed rather natural not to play with my other schoolmates since I'd never engaged in play anyway. 'Play' was a foreign concept to me, and having trained hard to become an outstanding shinobi, it was somewhat meaningless. 

Realising her mistake, Tsukika bowed apologetically to me, her chestnut ponytail spreading out over her shoulders like a small fan. 

Then, after giving me a small box, she ran out of the school grounds, turned around once, and waved back to me once before running off into the distance.

*****

I spent much of my recesses in the classroom, where I'd be training. Of course, I'd be practicing the jutsus I'd learnt in Konoha, since it would be a fatal mistake to practise the jutsus I'd learnt in my hometown here, on enemy ground. 

Of course, the temptation would become unbearable whenever I was alone in a forest clearing, where no one would find me. However, knowing my duty to my village, I resisted the urge to practise the high level jutsus I¡¯d learnt, and instead would perfect my skills at the lower level jutsus. 

I was practising at the back of the classroom again with my newfound and only friends Asuma and Tsukika. I noticed that Tsukika had extremely poor chakra control, and decided that perhaps I could help her in return for the box of fragrant wildflowers she'd given me the other day. 

"Tsukika-san..." I felt rather awkward speaking to her, but then again, this was one of the few times I'd spoken face-to-face with a girl. 

"Hai!" She spun around eagerly and stared intently at my face, her cheeks a shy shade of pink. 

"Uh... your chakra control isn't very good, you know. Would you like me to teach you--"

The door burst open, and a boy around my age with a bowl haircut, impossibly thick eyebrows and no fashion sense, ran into our classroom. I had not seen him before, so I assumed that he was probably from another class. 

"Tsukika-chaaaaaaan!!!" He called out in an overly melodramatic voice. Patting his chest confidently, he said, "I, Maito Gai, will become the best ninja in the whole wide world! Come away with me and we shall..."

His voice trailed off, and he stared forlornly in Tsukika's direction. Following his gaze, I realised that Tsukika had covered her ears with her hands. Asuma sighed knowingly, and sucked his lollipop deliberately. 

Gai looked crushed, and he spun around, fists clenched. "You! You must have stolen her heart! See how she ignores me! She was never like this before!" 

With a roar, Gai ran towards me and prepared to punch my face. I, on the other hand, anticipated his movements, and got ready to dodge an attack that never came. 

Gai was already sprawled flat on the ground before he even was an arm's length away from me¡ªhe had tripped over a crack in the worn floorboards. 

Asuma shook his head, still sucking on his lollipop. 

Gai was up in an instant, cussing violently. "You set a booby trap didn't you?"

I sighed inwardly and retorted, "No, I most certainly did not." 

"Did too."

"Did not."

Asuma merely threw up his hands and rolled his eyes as we continued our childish argument. 

*****

After school, Gai challenged me to a fight in the grassy schoolyard. Of course, many other Ninja wannabes stayed to watch, and I noted that a few seniors came to observe us. 

From what I had gathered, Gai was an average student in the class next door, and an ardent admirer of Tsukika. 

I sighed, and wondered why I should be fighting him. I didn't even like Tsukika, not in _that _way anyway. 

*****

The fight was over in a flash. Or rather, there was no fight. Gai stubbed his toe on a root protruding out of the ground, and ended up rolling about wailing pathetically. The most ridiculous thing was, he even thought that I had set another 'booby trap' and even acknowledged me as his rival. 

What a weird person... that Gai...

A/n: I know the 'booby traps' and the 'rivalry' between Kakashi and Gai are very much like that between Naruto and Konohamaru. It was intentional XD 

And I apologise to Gai fans who find this chapter mildly offensive. Gai once described himself as a 'loser at the bottom of the class' (Sorry, I translated the phrase from Chinese, and so it isn't really accurate XP The original words are 'diao4 che1 wei3') so I made him into a loser. But don't worry, Gai will make a comeback later in the story ^^;;

And once more, I'd like to tell all reviewers how much I appreciate their reviews. Don't stop reviewing okay? The success of this project will be measured by the number of reviews received. Thanks ^^ 

Oh, and by the way, to those who are reading my other fanfics, I apologise for not updating for so long.. I swear that once I'm done with this project, I'll update the others too okay? 

And yes, I reassure you, this fic will be updated rather frequently ^^;;


	6. Chapter 5

** Grey**

** Chapter 5 **

Graduation was a simple affair, to me at least. We only had to perform a simple jutsu to graduate. In my case, it was Bunshin no Jutsu, and naturally, I was wearing the Leaf forehead protector in no time. 

After graduation, we were swarmed by parents, tutors, friends and other villagers curious to find out who had graduated and who had not. Hence, the usually spacious schoolyard seemed rather crowded today, and I sat on the rickety swing under the tree, bored. 

As I watched my fellow graduates congratulate one another in the afternoon sun, I wondered sadly what it would have been like to have graduated from the Hidden Cloud Ninja Academy. Would it have been as easy as this? My heart ached as I thought about 'tousan and 'kaasan, and Pochi. 

I started as I felt a hand rest reassuringly on my shoulder. I looked up, and saw Hayato-niichan behind me. He asked, concerned, "Ne, Kakashi, what's wrong? You've graduated, and you're a Genin now. You should be happy, shouldn't you? What's bothering you?" 

I cursed myself inwardly, and quickly cooked up a feasible story to explain my forlorn expression, which was evident, even through my dark blue mask. 

Looking up pensively at Hayato-niichan, I told him sadly, "I really wish that Otousan and Okaasan were here to see me graduate..." 

I let tears roll down my cheeks, in a bid to obtain Hayato-niichan's pity. He drew me into a hug, and patted my back soothingly, as I sobbed uncontrollably into his shoulder. 

*****

Happily enough, Hayato-niichan, became our sensei. I was grouped together with Asuma and Tsukika in Team 4, which was great, since I worried about how I would cope with my new teammates. You see, even though I'd spent quite some time in Konoha, I only stuck to Hayato-niichan, Asuma and Tsukika and mostly kept to myself. 

Of course, teamwork was no problem at all, since I enjoyed being with the people I was familiar with. Tsukika's zealousness also kept our team spirit alive even through the darkest of times. 

C and D rank missions and training took up much of the time I spent as a Genin, and I realised that the missions we undertook opened several windows that revealed much about my teammates to me. Sure, I already knew them even before we were assigned to the same team, but I realised that a person's true colours would only come through under adverse circumstances. 

Tsukika, who was usually girlish to the extent of making my skin crawl, displayed outstanding levels of determination that surpassed many others our age. And even though she knew that she wasn't a very talented ninja, she tried her very best in everything she did, while keeping the team's spirit up. She was especially protective of both Asuma and I when we were injured, and was always the one to resolve all the squabbles within the team. 

Asuma was very laidback, and was perpetually chewing on something, be it a stick from a lollipop, a blade of grass, or a twig from a tree. This strange habit of his got on my nerves frequently, and I always had to keep reminding him of the dangers of not looking where he was going. He was especially boisterous before we set off on our missions, and would always be there to give us encouragement, especially in times when we needed it most. 

Hayato-sensei was as protective of us as a hen was for her chicks. He would always be there to ward off attacks from the enemy, though he would always gave us some room so that we could learn from our experiences in every mission. 

Needless to say, having spent so much time together, it was difficult to detach myself from my teammates. It took even more effort to tear myself away from Hayato-sensei to run away into the depths of the woods to practise and revise the jutsu I'd learnt back home in Hidden Cloud Country. 

Hayato-sensei encouraged self-training, since he believed that this would help us develop our skills more effectively, and would also force us to discipline ourselves, and develop at our own pace in order to move forward with our teammates. 

And of course, Gai was always there to pepper our lives with his ridiculous antics. The boy really thought he was cool, but he was so blinded by oblivion that he failed to realise how foolish he looked while trying to impress 'Tsukika-chaaaaaaan'. He would vacillate between being overly dramatic and 'brooding' --almost as if he wanted to intrigue her by the intensity of his thinking.

But behind all that, I knew that he was jealous, extremely jealous of me. Not only was I in Tsukika's team, I was also a better ninja than he was. Both of us knew this all too well and there was an ongoing 'rivalry' between the two of us. 

Once, Gai swallowed his pride and asked me rather grudgingly, "Ne, Kakashi... What is it that you do that makes you excel? I hardly ever see you train..." 

Of course, I couldn't tell him all about those endless, demanding days training back in Hidden Cloud Village. So I said, "Hi. Mi. Tsu," and stuck my tongue out at him through my mask.

It wasn't my intention to spite him, but I knew that I could never tell anyone my darkest secret. Childish pettiness was the only way out. 

*****

I found my new confidant by chance on the streets of Konoha. I appreciated him for the fact that he could not speak and reveal my secrets. Moreover, he also was a reminder of the days I'd spent back in Hidden Cloud Village. 

"Ne, should I go for the chuunin exam, Blue-chan?" Blue licked my cheek, and nuzzled my neck gently, its nose leaving a wet trail of saliva on my skin. I stroked the puppy's fur, and held him close to my chest. I wanted to go for the Chuunin exam, which Hayato-sensei had recommended our team for, but I felt that I was still too young to be a Chuunin. 

After all, a Chuunin was supposed to be the leader of his team. Yeah, sure, right now I _was_ the leader of our team. Somehow, it just didn't seem right: a six year old boy a barely up to his sensei's waist taking the Chuunin exam. 

I shook my head to clear my thoughts, and assessed my teammates' abilities. From what I knew, both Asuma and Tsukika did not really possess the abilities demanded of a Chuunin. Moreover, I suspected that our nomination stemmed from my ability, since Hayato-sensei probably did not want my talent to go to waste. 

I felt rather uneasy about taking the Chuunin exam not just because I was worried about Asuma and Tsukika; I was worried for myself too. 

From what I had heard, the Chuunin exam required one to have ability, as well as leadership skills. Hence, most of those nominated by their teachers to take the Chuunin exam would have the advantage of experience, age, and strength. 

Fingering the examination slip while absently stroking Blue's smoke-coloured fur, I leaned back against the whitewashed wall of my room and sighed. I knew I risked much by participating in the examination. What if I was caught in a difficult situation during the exam? Should I use my abilities to the utmost? Or would I withhold my strength and get beaten up so that my true purpose of coming to Konoha would remain masked? 

I sighed. I simply did not know. 

I scratched the area behind Blue's ears, and he squirmed happily in my lap. Hugging Blue close to me, I rubbed his back, and let him run outside. 

Hayato-sensei stepped into my room, and held out his hand. Yes, it was time for our routine evening walk again. 

A/n: Once again, I'd like to thank all reviewers for reviewing this fic. Honestly, I am rather disappointed by the response since I think this is one of my best fics I've written, and well, some of my other fics are total crap and they have more reviews. Ah well. Life is unfair _ Bah. I must be content with what I have. 

Raspberry Jam I recently found out about the 'Janken pon' (spelling?) thing and the Kakashi vs Gai rivalry. XP I'm sorry I couldn't incorporate that into the fic because I found that out too late XP Ah well. Oh, and no, the paring isn't KakaIru. ^^;; Sorry to disappoint, but you'll see soon. 


	7. Chapter 6

**Grey**

**Chapter 6 **

As we walked down the streets of Konoha, I clung to Hayato-sensei's hand, with Blue trotting at our feet. After turning yet another corner, Hayato-sensei said, "Ne, Kakashi, we are going to have dinner at Jiraiya-sensei's house. I think Orochimaru-sensei and Tsunade-sensei will be there too."

I looked up at his smiling face, and muttered, "The food had better be good. I'm pretty sick of eating cup ramen already." 

Hayato-sensei rolled his eyes and grinned at me, his teeth flashing in the twilight. "The food will be good, I promise."

*****

I could already smell the aroma of delicious cooking even before I entered Jiraiya's house. Hayato-sensei knocked on the door, and then stuck his head into the room. "Hey, look at who I've brought!" 

Leading me into the relatively scruffy room, with Blue in tow, Hayato-sensei introduced me to the trio seated before a round table set for five. Better known collectively as the _sannin_, or The Three Ninjas, they were said to be among the best in the village. 

I sat nervously next to Hayato-sensei when invited to take a seat. To my right was Orochimaru-sensei. I stared at him rather curiously, if not in awe. This was the first time I'd met him, and the stately solemnity he exuded impressed me greatly. 

Although I had heard several disturbing schoolyard rumours about him, I did not feel any fear when I saw him, even though he did look rather scary up close. 

Orochimaru wore his jet black hair long, and his pale, almost sickly skin contrasted greatly with it. The irises of his eyes were gold in colour, and his pupils were slightly elongated, rather like a cat's. The dark lines around his eyes appeared to be a tattoo. 

Unfolding his arms, he turned to look at me. "You must be Hatake Kakashi, Hayato's student. I've heard quite a good deal about you." He grinned, exposing his extraordinarily long canines, and thoughtfully placed a slice of fish in my bowl.

In the meantime, Hayato-sensei had accepted Jiraiya's challenge to eat a whole plate of tempura for dinner. Tsunade-sensei betted that Hayato-sensei couldn't do it, while Jiraiya insisted that his student would do anything for him. 

I rolled my eyes and smiled. I rarely saw the goofy side of Hayato-sensei, even though I was supposedly very close to him. He was usually very serious with me, and frequently gave me pep talks for not being sufficiently sociable. Although he cracked the occasional joke with our team, he usually told it with a deadpan expression, and we were the ones rolling on the floor with laughter. I stifled a giggle as Hayato-sensei's face scrunched up like a ball of crushed paper after tasting Jiraya-sensei's homemade tempura. Evidently, it tasted a lot worse than the cup ramen we usually ate.

Amid the the grey-haired man's cries of foul play, and Tsunade-sensei's glee at winning the bet, Orochimaru remained calm and dignified even as he stuffed half-cooked meat into his mouth.

I studied Orochimaru out of the corner of my eye as I tried to keep a straight face while downing barely edible food. Apparently, I was caught looking, and he asked, smiling as he spoke, "Kakashi-kun, is there something you'd like to ask?"

Without thinking, I let the words shoot out of my mouth, "I'd like to become a first-rate shinobi." 

I didn't even answer his question directly, and besides, I'd never seen him in action before. Although I knew he was one of the _sannin_, I actually was tempted to ask him to show his mettle to prove his strength, being the sceptical kid I was. 

In his low and rough voice, he replied after a short pause, "I've been watching you, Kakashi-kun. You have great potential. But there are some things that just cannot be taught. A first-rate shinobi must have talent, and he must work hard in order to fulfill his maximum potential. I cannot teach you how to reach that goal. You must find the path yourself." 

Nodding gratefully at him, I turned to poke at the unfinished food in my bowl, as I digested Orochimaru-sensei's words of wisdom. 

Meanwhile, raucous laughter and the strong smell of sake filled the air. Glancing over at the trio on the other side of the table, I shook my head, as they continued entertaining one another with their antics and boasts. 

*****

Thanks to Orochimaru's advice, I made the decision to take part in the chuunin examination, which I passed, of course. I was one of three who passed the exam, and at the tender age of six, the youngest of the lot. I felt really bad about having to leave my wonderful teammates Asuma and Tsukika, as well as Hayato-sensei, but I knew that if I wanted to fulfill my goals the only way was up. I had already made plans for the future: chuunin, jounin, then perhaps Anbu; it was only through this that I would be able to fulfill my duty to my village as a spy. 

I was assigned to a four-man chuunin team, and was to undertake the more challenging and dangerous B and C ranked missions. My three other teammates were Kyojiro, Rei and Shou. Like me, Kyojiro had just passed the chuunin exam. However, unlike me, he wasn't a rookie, and was also five whole years older than me. 

As expected, I was the youngest in my whole team, and Rei, the oldest, was thrice my age. As a result, I was often the one being protected during missions, for my teammates treated me like a younger brother. Although I appreciated their concern for me, the last thing I wanted was to keep living in the shadow of others, a useless piece of baggage.

I did try my best to explain to the others that I wasn't as weak as I looked, but Rei would hear nothing of that sort. He told me sternly that although I did have the skills required of a chuunin, I would surely lose out in hand-to-hand combat, especially when dealing with older and bigger enemy ninja who had no qualms about killing. Only six, I had yet to acquire battlefield experience, and did not have the physical strength to overcome my older opponents in Taijutsu. 

I stubbornly refused to listen to Rei's explanation, and was determined to show my teammates that I wasn't a silly little tot who kept getting in their way. 

My chance to prove myself finally came when we were hired to protect an unpopular politician from his potential assassins. As expected, a band of jounins from Hidden Sand Village attacked us. 

Since protecting our client was our top priority, my teammates were unable to take care of me. When spotted by two of the enemy ninjas, they rushed to attack me, wielding Swords of the Wind, expecting that I would be taken care of easily. 

I moved my hands frantically through a series of seals, I gathered chakra around my hands, a technique I had adapted from what I had seen when I was still in Hidden Cloud Village. 

As I smashed my hands through the attacking ninjas, I felt infused with a power never felt before. I watched coolly as their blood spattered onto my face. I relished the feel of their insides squelching against my hands, the sound of their last, half-choked groans, the smell of death. And for a fleeting moment, a small smile crossed my face. 

A/n: All righty. Chapter 6 is up ^^;; after a whole horrendous barrage of tests ^^;; Somehow FanFiction.Net has gotten the number of reviews for this fic, and my other Naruto ones, wrong ^^;; Ah well. Doesn't really matter, does it? XD 

Once again, thanks for the reviews, and I'm glad to see that there are people who do appreciate serious fics XP When I first posted, the response wasn't that great, so I surmised that most people in the Naruto fandom didn't like serious fics-- they only go for SasuNaru ones XP So I guess you reviewers out there have proven me wrong, and I'm glad to know that. ^^;; Keep the reviews coming and, enjoy the story ^^ 


	8. Chapter 7

**Grey**

**Chapter 7 **

Rei and Shou were beginning to fear my strength, my ability to kill without twitching a hair. I, on the other hand, despised them for being soft and unable to treat themselves as tools that would obey orders and kill mercilessly. Although our unit still worked as a team, I had been put in a different light since that day, and I could already sense a rift separating us. 

The distance between us only grew over the years, and the numerous B-rank missions we undertook only forced me to draw more blood. Moreover, my outstanding performance in battle caused a certain degree of envy and jealousy for me. 

I was often green with envy whenever I saw other teams enjoying themselves in one another's company. It didn't help that the rest of my team was very close while I stood apart from them, often unable to join in. Although Kyojiro did attempt to integrate me into the team, Rei and Shou were unwilling to let me join them. Sometimes I wondered if I might have been happier remaining as the baby of the team, but I knew I would have rebelled against that sooner or later. 

I suffered greatly during the time spent as a chuunin because I had no friends to share my troubles with. Hayato-sensei was often occupied, being a jounin, and a candidate for the post of Yondaime Hokage. Hence conversations with him hardly progressed beyond greetings and small talk. Being a busy person myself, I was often stressed and burdened with other problems. Gradually, I began to develop insomnia, for every time I lay down, I would dwell on all the pain that I'd suffered all this while. 

Although I met Asuma and Tsukika occasionally, it was difficult to pour out my grievances to them. They were my only true friends besides Hayato-sensei, and yet, I found myself unable to open my heart to them. Why?

And then there was my mission of spying on Konoha. I wasn't getting anywhere with it; my entire life was devoted to completing my missions, and I hardly even thought about the original objective that I had risked so much for.

I felt incredibly lost. It had been nearly seven years since I'd set out on the mission that my village had wagered its honour on. And yet, in these long months that I'd spent here in Konoha, I had accomplished nothing, only risking my life and cheating others of the truth they ought to know about me. 

I often had nightmares of myself getting caught by the Konoha Anbu, being mutilated with small knives, being the victim of someone's genjutsu, or having to suffer the white hot pain that was so real, and yet completely intangible. 

Hayato-sensei says I scream in my sleep sometimes, so I tell him it's just the memories of my parents' last moments coming back to haunt me. 

*****

When given the chance to sit for the Jounin examination, I snatched at it, for I could not bear being with my teammates for much longer. Since the jounin examination was to be taken individually--unlike the chuunin exam, I simply passed a polite note to my teammates to inform them of my participation in the exam. 

It wasn't like they really cared anyway. I did it out of courtesy so that they had one less thing to hate me for. Kakashi this, Kakashi that. Nothing I did was ever right, and I was openly rejected by my teammates for being a true shinobi. 

It is widely known and accepted fact that a shinobi is merely a tool, one without emotion, who will follow his master's orders no matter what. I was only trying my best to become a first-rate shinobi, so what was wrong with being a detached killing machine? 

I couldn't understand my teammates. That was probably the main reason why I decided to move on, and hopefully meet others who would understand me better. 

There were 26 other candidates taking part in the first round of the examination, Asuma and Gai among them. We were to fight it out among ourselves within a confined area--a test of our survival skills. 

The system was somewhat like that in the Chuunin exam, just that it was one-on-one combat all the way. However, what made it different and challenging was that each of the candidates was to collect three different scrolls: Fire, Water and Air within three days. We also had to make a 30 kilometre trek to the tower situated at the epicentre of the 'park'.

Therefore, only a maximum of 9 could pass the first round of the examination. However, there was also a possibility that no one would get past this round. 

The odds were against us, and since the venue--the Forest of Death was home to many treacherous animals such as giant snakes and wild beasts, we risked death with our participation in this examination. 

As I stood outside the chained gates of the Forest of Death, I gulped, and swallowed the fear churning within me. I knew that the other candidates were older than me, and hence I guessed that I would probably be one of the first to be targeted, along with Asuma and Gai. 

I pondered my moves as time trickled by. The time for us to enter the venue had not come, so I slowly came up with a strategy which would require either Asuma or Gai to play an integral role, depending on whom I found first. 

The gates swung open with an eerie creak as the clock struck ten. I sped into the Forest of Death, bracing myself for attacks, while searching for Asuma and Gai. 

As it turned out, I found Gai first, and we agreed to form an alliance and watch each other's backs. Both of us found it perfectly logical that we would become the main targets of attack by the rest of the older, battle-scarred candidates, since we were inexperienced eleven-year-olds.

However, despite being agreeable to everything else, our main problem lay with the scrolls. What would happen if we only managed to gather three different scrolls, which was only sufficient for one person to pass? After much deliberation, we agreed to fight it out if it came to that. 

*****

Much as we would have liked to avoid fighting each other, we were unfortunate enough to gather only four scrolls, insufficient for the two of us. Naturally, I found it against my morals to fight against my comrade in battle, but our situation was such that we had no choice. 

Our fight was not at all reminiscent of our childhood conflicts. It was a full blown battle that caused significant changes to our surroundings. Gai had improved by leaps and bounds, and he had long since matured from the silly loser of his childhood days. Some things, like his poor taste in fashion, hadn't changed. However, he now could move at the speed of light, and very often, I had to rely on instinct, rather than on my senses, to detect his presence. 

However, a serious tactical blunder on his part gave me a chance to defeat him, and hence the scrolls were mine. Although I felt the triumph of beating an outstanding ninja like him, I still felt a pang of guilt for betraying him. 

*****

As it turned out, I was the only one who had managed to amass the required number of scrolls, and reach the tower within the time limit. 

The other interviews and tests flew by, and before I knew it, I was a fully-fledged jounin. Since I was new, I was not put in charge of any genin, but was often sent on A-ranked missions to assassinate for a fee. Chidori, named for its unique sound resulting from friction, was especially useful, effective and humane way to kill. Quick and relatively painless, it quickly became my main tool in killing. 

I had become firm friends with a teenager three years my senior, Uchiha Obito, for we were often dispatched together on missions, strangely enough. Obito put it to fate, and often joked about us being chosen to be together by Kami-sama. 

I was so much more at home with my fellow jounins, because we were all true ninjas, killing without remorse. The couple of years I spent in the jounin division of Konoha's ninja force were probably one of the most memorable times of my life. 

Hence, when I was given a chance to join Anbu, I hesitated, unwilling to leave the company of these wonderful people who shared similar dreams, and who were willing to stand up for their teammates. 

A/n: Once again, thanks to all you reviewers, especially my classmates, who have been so supportive of me *sniffles*, as well as Azi: Naruto's Twin Sister. ^^ Love you lots!! 


	9. Chapter 8

**Grey **

**Chapter 8**

Warning: Spoilers for chapter 121 (volume 14 of the manga).

It was indeed a difficult choice to make¡ªto join or not to join Anbu. So far, I'd spent two years as a Jounin. I was thirteen now, and was faced with the multi-faceted problems of growing up: mood swings, hyperactivity, angst, defiance and the like. 

Besides the standard emotional rollercoaster usually experienced by most teenagers, I had to contend with many other problems I had to face myself. Hayato-sensei, now the Yondaime Hokage, hardly had the time or energy to spare. Most of his free time was spent with his girlfriend, and I thought it selfish to deprive him of his well-deserved rest. 

That was fine with me, since I had my friends, my fellow Jounins, who could listen to me rant. 

One thing really bothered me. It boiled down to a simple question of my loyalty to Konoha. Did I consider my friends true friends? Would I, one day, turn my back on them and fight, shoulder to shoulder with my kinsmen from Hidden Cloud Village? Or would I instead, side with my friends in Konoha? 

But right now, my biggest concern was whether I should join Anbu or not. I treasured the friendships I'd built up, and feared the sense of insecurity that might overpower me without the company of my friends. However, it was also my duty to my village to infiltrate Konoha. Being stuck in a dilemma like that wasn't fun, and it took Obito to convince me to join Anbu. 

As it turned out, Obito had also been invited to join Anbu. He urged me to join too, and after some time, I was won over by his eloquence and entered the Anbu of Konoha, whose ranks were filled by the elite. 

It was an exhilarating moment when I was handed the uniform and mask which designated me as officially part of the Anbu. However, whether it was because I could finally serve Konoha as an elite ninja, or because I could finally gain access to Konoha's secrets, I could not tell.

*****

Obito and I were assigned to the same team, with Yamanaka Kazuki and Nara Kirito ordered to guide us in our missions. Kazuki and Kirito were highly skilled, and they were more than eager to teach us the ropes. 

Of course, nothing could beat on-the-job training, so for a while, we handled fairly straightforward cases such as assassinations, and then slowly progressed to hunting down wanted ninjas who had defected to other countries. I found it strangely fulfilling to be able to kill and smell the coppery smell of blood that weighed the air down with death.

However, four months into the job, we were posted to investigate the mysterious disappearances of ninjas of different ranks. These ninjas usually vanished during missions but some were also reported missing while they were off-duty. It was indeed very queer, and five other teams, besides our own, were dispatched to look into the matter. 

At first, I was rather disappointed that we were to investigate, which meant that stealth was vital. I much preferred the thrill of fast-paced chases and assassinations to such a sluggish mission. However, the authorities were thoroughly convinced that at least one ninja was behind this spate of disappearances. He was probably at least a Jounin, since most of those missing were Chuunins and Genins. We received orders to work fast and report our discoveries to base as quickly as we could. 

I soon found that our new investigative mission was not as boring and simple as it seemed at first. We soon realised that we were dealing with a potentially dangerous assassin, after one of the Anbu teams sent to investigate went missing. 

The suspects were largely those who had the ability to subdue and kill Anbu. Orochimaru-sensei was one of them, but I was sceptical of this. To me, Orochimaru-sensei was a role-model, one who always was there to give me encouragement when the time called for it. He never failed to highlight the fact that I had potential to become a great ninja, and even agreed to my request to teach me some of his jutsus. 

However, I hadn't been seeing him of late, ever since I'd joined the Anbu, and so I felt a little guilty because of that. I imagined that he would feel betrayed, hurt, among other things.

We continued our mission after receiving the news of the Anbu team's disappearance, gathering information as per normal, and although no one showed it, I could tell that everyone feared for his life. There was no telling if we were going to be the next victim of the mysterious murderer we were tracking. Even though we knew that every mission we undertook could result in our death, we took our safe return from every journey for granted, never imagining that death itself could one day, knock on our door. 

I often shared my thoughts with my teammates, but I remained closest to Obito. Something about him told me that I could trust him, and more often than not, he was the target of my ranting. Seven years older than me, Obito was like an elder brother to me, and he always was there to comfort me in my darkest moments. 

But this time, there was no comforting to be done. Everyone knew all too well that we could be the next Anbu team to go missing, and this knowledge caused our usually casual mood to become sombre and grave. 

In fact, it was this very knowledge that motivated us to seek out the killer. Fuelled by our own selfish desire to survive, we were determined to give our all to find the culprit. We left no stone unturned, and watched the suspects closely. Yet ninjas continued to disappear and our frustration knew no bounds. Who was this killer?

The last straw came when Kazuki went missing while going off to relieve himself. We heard a yell from the direction in which he had gone, and ran quickly to investigate. 

Suddenly, I collapsed, clutching my head. I felt as if someone else was trying to take over my mind... Advanced Shintenshin no Jutsu... Kazuki? 

_Kakashi...Don't panic. It's only me, Kazuki. I've been captured by Orochimaru-sense...It seems that he _is _the culprit after all... We're currently headed north... Destination seems to be the abandoned warehouse at the edge of the village... _

*****

The Sandaime Hokage was with us in no time. He was old, doubtless, but he still possessed the most of the power he had in his younger days. 

We entered the warehouse silently, and examined the ground and the ceiling for booby traps. It seemed as if Orochimaru-sensei had been completely sure that we would find him, for there were many booby traps lying around us. A false move could result in our death. Kirito offered to remain outside to help watch our backs. 

Inching across the floor and checking for false tiles at the same time, our team, and the Sandaime Hokage made little progress. We felt trapped, as if suspended in that moment in time, and the door before us seemed further away from us with every step we took. 

I cursed. We had fallen into a trap. It was very difficult to break the jutsu and get out of this illusion we were stuck in. The Sandaime Hokage sighed and moved his hands swiftly in a series of seals. We felt the room give a shuddering heave, and then, we were right before the door. 

I heard the Hokage mutter, "One should never use the jutsus your teacher taught you..."

*****

We found Orochimaru in the basement of the building. The floor was flooded with dripping water from faulty pipes, and the air was heavy with death. The smell of rotting flesh seemed to come from a room at the end of the corridor, and armed with the grim expectation of what we could possibly find there, we flung the door open.

Orochimaru stood amongst a sea of corpses. 

He turned at the sound of us entering the room, and sneered, an evil grin on his face, "Oh... So I've been discovered, eh? What a pity..." 

The Sandaime Hokage, unable to believe his eyes, stared in horror at his former protege, once his pride and joy. He blurted out, "Orochimaru! What's this all about?" 

I staggered, and took a step backwards. I couldn't believe my eyes. Here was Orochimaru-sensei, the ninja who had told me to pursue my dream, whom I'd idolised for a while when I was younger. How could this be? 

Obito caught me in his arms and queried, "Orochimaru-sensei, why would you, an outstanding ninja..." 

"Oh, would you like to join my--guests?"

Obito gulped, and was silent. 

Meanwhile, the Sandaime Hokage stared sadly at Orochimaru, and asked, "Why, Orochimaru, why would you want to do such a hideous thing?"

"I'm doing this to develop Furou Fushi no jutsu, the doorway to all the other jutsus."

"Orochimaru..." The Hokage summoned Enkouou-enma, and appeared to make preparations to attack Orochimaru-sensei. 

However, Orochimaru sniggered, and told the Hokage that he wouldn't have the heart to kill his very own student. 

He was right. The Sandaime Hokage did not attack Orochimaru-sensei even as he turned and strode, right past us, into the long watery tunnel ahead of him and behind us. 

*****

Our heroic teammate Kazuki died of severe internal injuries that night. Thankfully, he had not yet been made a victim of Orochimaru's insane experiments. It appeared that Orochimaru injured him so that he wouldn't be able to escape. 

There was no news of Orochimaru for many months after that incident, and he was presumed to be dead. Yet deep within our hearts we knew that he was still out there, and a dark pall cast itself over all of us. 

A/n: Thanks again, to all you nice people who have reviewed my fic. ^^ You guys make me feel appreciated!! XD 

Note: Enkouou-enma is the old monkey the Sandaime Hokage summons. 


	10. Chapter 9

**Grey**

**Chapter 9**

Kazuki's death saddened us all, and many a time, we would blame ourselves for neglecting to protect him. However, that also served to motivate us further in our missions, and we vowed to avenge his death when the chance arose, no matter what the cost. 

Then one day, I realised that I had to begin watching my own back, besides worrying about my deceased teammate. The Sandaime Hokage had called for a meeting with all the Anbu and jounins, and formally announced that a spy from Hidden Cloud Village had been captured. The captive was brought into the meeting room, bound and gagged. Meanwhile, I worried for myself, and prayed to the gods to keep me safe. 

One of the jounins forced the captive to look up at all of us by giving his hair a sharp yank upwards. The prisoner, barely conscious from hours of torture, stared at us with glazed eyes. 

Then it clicked. Prior to seeing his face, I had simply dismissed him as another spy, just another incompetent spy who might betray me and our village. I was shocked to see that the spy was one of my bodyguards who had cared for me as a child. He saw me, and his eyes brightened for an instant, but then dulled again as he realised that I must not be discovered. I had forgotten his name, and yet at that very moment, I felt like falling to my knees and begging Hokage-sama to let him off. I couldn't explain that thought, but I supposed that it was partly due to my gratitude and affection for him that caused me to do so. 

He seemed to realise what I was about to do, and he shook his head very slightly--enough to tell me not to act on impulse. I gulped, and stared helplessly as I watched my ex-bodyguard succumb to the various methods of torture applied to him. Blood trickled out of his nose, mouth and ears, and all I could do was watch him suffer at the hands of my friends. 

Memories of him helping me retrieve a lost kite, fixing a broken toy--all those flooded my mind right then, and I felt the urge to run right up there and defend him. But no, I was a spy, and I couldn't allow myself to act without considering the consequences of my actions. 

I shook my head, trying to drive all those memories of old out of my mind. I would not allow myself to be controlled by my emotions. What was more, I reminded myself, an Anbu was built to kill, and must not harbour any affections for a life he was about to take. 

Obito turned and looked at me, having noticed the pheromones of confusion I was emitting. "Kakashi, are you okay?" He whispered under his breath, for it was an unspoken rule that we were not to speak whenever it came to situations like these. 

I nodded, but Obito still wasn't convinced. He continued to pass concerned looks at me. Despite my mask, I was still unable to conceal the fact that my lips were trembling. I fought hard to control myself, but my hands and fingers still felt cold. My heart ached with every cry, every muffled groan the prisoner made.

Admittedly, I knew next to nothing about my ex-bodyguard, but he seemed a kind and good-natured man. But it wasn't just that. He was also my countryman, my bodyguard who had gone beyond the call of duty to care for me. 

And all this while, I hadn't noticed that my fists were clenched, involuntarily. 

*****

When I got home, I was greeted by the sight of a matronly-looking woman pacing anxiously in front of my house. When she saw me, she nervously wiped her palms on her apron, and introduced herself as Yuko. She quickly fished out a soiled scroll from her pocket, and passed it to me, saying that it was from her husband, Ichiro. Before I could even invite her in for tea, she left hurriedly.

I didn't think much of her strange behaviour, and guessed that her husband had probably told her to have as little contact with me as possible. Shrugging, I turned and entered my house while examining the sealed scroll.

I shut the door behind me and locked it, just to be safe. I had recently moved out of Hayato-sensei's house to make room for his pregnant wife. Although Hayato-sensei did ask me to stay, I couldn't stand the sight of the couple cuddling and whispering sweet nothings in each other's ear. Besides, I also needed my own space, so I moved out of his place and into a crummy but cozy house nearby. 

Flopping myself onto the green sofa that had been a gift from Hayato-sensei, I scrutinised the scroll, which had been tied up with a piece of string. It didn't appear to be a ninja scroll, and didn¡¯t carry any special emblems either. Deciding that it would be safe to open the scroll, I tugged at the brown string that bound it. 

To my surprise, the string wouldn't budge, so I sat up and tugged harder. The knot was a simple one that ought to come undone rather easily, and it puzzled me that it wouldn't loosen. 

Then it occurred to me that this was probably a secret document that was sealed with a rope-binding jutsu. Unsure of whether it was a document from Leaf or Cloud, I studied the scroll again, and then tentatively sprayed water onto it. 

As expected, a Cloud emblem surfaced on a portion of the wet paper. Nervously, I moved my hands in a series of seals that I had not performed in years, and directed my chakra towards the string. The string undid itself, and fell limply to the ground.

Hands trembling with anticipation, I picked up the scroll, and opened it, only to find a clumsily-written letter sealed into it. 

_Kakashi-kun (Or should I call you Kurai-chan?),_

_ Do you still remember me? I'm Ichiro, your ex-bodyguard. I was sent here by your father, Raikage-sama, to help watch your back, as well as to gather news about the forbidden jutsu you were supposed to investigate. _

_ By the time you are reading this, I would probably have been caught by those Konoha bastards. In case you are wondering, my wife knows nothing of my background, so you won't have to worry about her spilling the beans about your identity. _

_ I was sent here 3 years after you left, because your 'tousan was worried about you. But when I told him you were safe and sound, he flew into a rage, because he felt that you were not reporting to base out of cowardice, because you knew that every time you reported your findings to Hidden Cloud Village, your life would be at risk._

_ Your 'tousan may think that you are a weakling but I beg to differ. Kurai-chan, I believe that you have your reasons for not reporting your findings to our village. But now that it's come to this, I hope that you will inform Raikage-sama of the results of your investigation. _

_I remain your loyal servant,_

_Ichiro _

I read the letter twice, and then burned it angrily. I felt hurt and betrayed, and out of spite, I dug up the scrolls in which I had sealed information about Konoha, and threw them into the blazing fire. How dare 'tousan doubt my abilities? How dare he think that I was a coward? How dare he! He wouldn't know about living under the nose of a special jounin, and how difficult life was for me because of his abilities. It was already difficult enough trying to practise the jutsus I¡¯d learnt back in Hidden Cloud Village, much less send information back to my hometown. 

I had originally planned on sending the scrolls by using one of my ninken as a messenger but for doubting me, they would never receive this information. I smirked as the fire licked the scrolls hungrily and quickly reduced them to ashes. 

"Kakashi!" I spun around at the sound of the familiar voice. Obito stood a short distance away, and a suspicious frown marred his usually pleasant features.

I cursed myself for my lack of vigilance, but acted nonchalant and stuffed my hands into my pockets. "Yo."

"Kakashi, what were you burning?" Obito ignored my greeting and moved closer to examine the smouldering ashes. 

"Nothing much. Just burning my old diaries." I lied through clenched teeth.

Seeing that I was tight-lipped, Obito decided not to pursue the matter and I heaved a sigh of relief.

Then remembering his original reason for visiting me, he told me that our team had been assigned a new mission--to infiltrate Hidden Cloud Village. We would be briefed at headquarters, and would set off in four hours under cover of darkness.

I went into the house to change, and awkwardly invited Obito in because I thought it rude if I made him wait outside. I made him some tea while he waited for me to sort my things out.

I felt his eyes bore into my back as I quickly changed into my Anbu uniform, feeling his eyes sweep over my body, memorising every contour of my wiry frame.

I turned around in response to his gaze, only to see that his Sharingan were on. 

*****

We were jumping from tree to tree, silent shadows flitting by with the grace of tigers on the prowl. Wordlessly, we sprang from branch to branch, feeling the liquid steel of our own muscles coil and uncoil, listening to our heart thump within our ribcage, a rhythm all of its own.

Kirito stopped, and we followed suit. We crouched on a bough, our sharpened senses on high alert. 

We were now on enemy ground. We could see the obvious change in the geography of the land ahead of us--trees were few and far between, and a glorious expanse of paddy fields met the eye.

It was a sight that I had pined for all these years away from home, but right then, I had other things on my mind.

"Kirito, I think I shall move ahead of you guys first as a scout." I summoned Pakkun, one of my trusty ninken." He will guide you according to my scent. I will alert you all to any obstacles ahead."

Kirito nodded, and I leapt off the bough, and into the shadows under the moonlit sky. 

A/n: Sorry for taking so long to update, been busy with tests and such XP Exams are coming up too, so I don't think I'll have much time to update until, say, 15 October. Then I'll have another major exam for Chinese (which I don't particularly like XP)

I'll be mugging in the meantime. Enjoy the cliffhanger. X3


	11. Chapter 10

**Grey**

**Chapter 10**

It had been three days since I left my teammates, and admittedly, I missed them, Obito in particular, already. There was a void within me that ached to be filled, and through the short period of solitude, I felt as though I could do anything to be with my team. Currently headed for the Raikage's headquarters, I was unsure how 'tousan would react when he saw me, clad in the Konoha Anbu uniform.

My pride was still smarting from the discovery of 'tousan's distrust in me, and I had half a mind to turn back and rejoin my companions. After all, 'tousan wouldn't even be able to recognise the boy he last saw nearly a decade ago, since I was wearing the animalistic mask that characterised the Konoha Anbu. 

However, deep within me, I felt pangs of guilt pound my conscience relentlessly. I was originally from Hidden Cloud Village, sent to spy on Konoha. Now I was a Konoha ninja, sent to attack my hometown. Didn't that make me a traitor?

I stopped, and took cover behind some shrubs. The streets of Hidden Cloud Village were largely the same as they were when I left. Shabbily-dressed people thronged the dusty streets, and in the distance, a woman's voice yelled, "Stop, thief!"

Yes, nothing much had changed.

*****

I walked down the streets nonchalantly, using the basic _Henge no Jutsu _to allow me to take the form of a young boy. This gave me much freedom to loiter, and stare curiously at new buildings that had sprung up in my absence. 

And yet, despite feeling the joy of coming home, I had to continuously be on the lookout for ninjas from Hidden Cloud Village, while finding my way around the crowded streets. I would have preferred to return home, not as an enemy ninja, but as a normal kid.

It took me quite a long while to locate the elusive headquarters of the Raikage; asking for directions was too risky since it would have drawn unwanted attention to me. The building stood before me, proud and tall, with a new coat of cream coloured paint that was incongruous with the air of ancient power it exuded. 

As I stepped into the building, two ninjas grabbed my arm, and led me into a room at the end of a long passageway. "Raikage-sama would like to speak to you, young man."

I didn't flinch or struggle, but instead stared curiously at the two ninjas beside me. They looked strangely familiar, and it suddenly occurred to me that they were around my age. Perhaps they had been one of my playmates? 

One of the shinobis knocked lightly on the all too familiar door, and a gruff voice answered. 

As I stepped into the scruffy and messy office of the Raikage, my 'tousan, I wondered what he would be like after all these years. How would he look like? But more importantly, what would he see me as? His son? A traitor? Or just another spy? 

The sunlight streaming into the room from behind the man prevented me from getting a good look at his face, but I could tell that he was more gaunt and haggard than I last remembered him to be. I released my jutsu, and removed both my masks.

"'Tousan."

"Kurai."

Our first encounter with each other after so many years was awkward, not emotional, as I imagined it to be. We didn't hug or clasp hands or anything of that sort, though, but merely scrutinised the other with detached interest, for we were little more than strangers now.

My father had aged noticeably over the decade of my absence. His eyes were sunken, and the beginnings of wrinkles lined his face. He also seemed shorter and leaner than I last remembered him to be, but perhaps that was partially due to my vertical growth. However, his eyes still possessed the fire from his youth, and it was this very pair of eyes that made him unique. 

We got down to business quickly after exchanging formalities, and I dutifully told 'tousan what I knew about the forbidden jutsu of Immortality, as well as the fact that it was only Orochimaru who had acted on his own accord. I stressed especially on the point that because the Hokage had nothing to do with the development of the jutsu, and was in fact against the idea, it didn't really concern Konoha.

'Tousan, who had been listening intently with a smug look on his face thus far, stood up abruptly and glared at me. "Kurai, you have been hypnotised by Konoha. I can see that your loyalties are divided. Return to Hidden Cloud Village imme--"

"NO!" I shouted, responding to the urge to defend the village I loved.

My father¡¯s eyes widened in shock at first, and then narrowed in suspicion and anger. A snarl tugged at his lips. "Kurai, snap out of it. You belong to Hidden Cloud Village and you will take orders from me. Give me the scrolls now."

I feigned ignorance, and said as innocently as I could, "... What scrolls?"

"You recorded your findings on scrolls. Ichiro told me. Now hand them over."

"I burned them." I smiled, taking pride in my courage to stand up to my tyrannical father. 

"You WHAT?"

"Burned them," I repeated, becoming bolder.

'Tousan's eyes widened slightly, taken aback by my defiance. I didn't back down from him, and instead tilted my head upwards and glared down at him. 

"Kurai..." He glowered at me, and his eyes seemed to burn with rage. His lips were pulled back in a snarl. He fumbled about in his robes for a weapon, and I, realising that I was not in favourable circumstances, put both my masks on again, and escaped through the window, shattering the glass and injuring myself in the process. 

'Tousan followed soon after, and I instinctively headed to my old training grounds, in a desperate search for a familiar environment. 

A kunai whizzed past my ear, and suddenly, it turned around and headed straight for me; it was evidently controlled by 'tousan's chakra. Forced to dodge, I dropped my weight, and let myself fall to the ground. The kunai missed me by several inches, and embedded itself in the ground with a loud thud. 

I weighed my options as I made preparations for battle. 'Tousan would surely send for reinforcements, so I had to deal with him quickly before his men arrived. But the problem was how? Yeah, sure he was my father and all, but I had never really seen him perform Ninjutsu, and hence that put me at a disadvantage. Would he use Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, or Genjutsu? I didn't know for sure. 

I planned to use Chidori to finish him off, but then again he wasn't any old opponent who could be killed so easily. He was one of the five Kages, which made him one of the five best ninjas around. A lowly Anbu like me would surely be unable to deal with him. What was more, he was my father, and although I am usually able to kill without flinching, I was emotionally attached to him to a certain extent, and that made it difficult for me to tackle him. 

Distracted by my thoughts, I failed to notice 'tousan's actions, so I was caught completely off-guard when he pointed a kunai at my throat. "Give it up, _traitor_." He hissed menacingly. "Even if you haven't given Hidden Cloud's secrets away yet, you will. I just know it."

The kunai moved closer to my jugular vein. My pulse quickened, and I felt the adrenalin rush through my system. My arms went up instinctively and I tried to wrestle control of the kunai, in self defence. 

But 'tousan was much stronger than he looked, and I was surprised when his kunai penetrated my Anbu mask, and drew blood from my left cheek. The warm, red liquid trickled down my cheek, but was quickly absorbed by the material of my cloth mask. The cherry wood mask cracked and fell to the ground in pieces. 

I continued to struggle, and when I finally managed to wrestle control of the kunai, I was shocked to realise that I had been fighting with a clone all this while. A cold, metallic presence behind me caused the hair on the back of my neck to stand on end, and it was with dread that I realised that I had fallen into 'tousan's trap. 

Suddenly unable to move my body, I looked down and saw that I had been restrained by a cocoon of mist. 'Tousan loomed over me, his eyes seeming to glow with an alien light. I winced, and resigned myself to the inevitable fate that awaited me. _So this is the difference between a lowly Anbu and a revered Raikage. I was foolish to have even imagined that I ever be able to fight on equal ground with one of the five Kages. _

I closed my eyes, and bowed to my fate. I felt 'tousan move before me as a large hand grabbed my hair roughly and tilted my face upwards to expose the jugular veins. I breathed in deeply, and my brain sought frantically for a solution. 

I struggled vainly at my bonds, and opened my eyes defiantly as I felt the rush of the wind as the kunai headed towards me.

Only to find that the kunai was coming straight at my left eye.

It was too late to turn away, and warning bells sounded in my head as I struggled vainly and braced myself for the sharp pain that was to come. 

The tip of the kunai buried itself into my eyeball as I screamed in pain, both in pain and horror. A warm and slightly sticky liquid flowed down my cheek in a rush, and for a split second, everything went red, and then everything was dark to my left eye. 

I would have clutched at my face if I could, but my hands were still bound by the jutsu. So all I could do was scream, and tears flowed down my cheeks uncontrollably. 

'Tousan smirked, and let the kunai run along my neck, tearing the cloth of my uniform in the process. "Kurai, count yourself lucky that you're still alive. But you won't be able to recover enough to remain a shinobi._ Ever._" 

With that, he slashed the left side of my neck, and blood spurted out from the wound. I knew that he wasn't really intending to kill me, but wanted to render me too weak to attack him. 

'Tousan released the jutsu and I tried to run towards him, brandishing a small dagger. It was a last ditch effort to injure him and exact my revenge. But in my haste, I failed to realise that with an increased heart rate, I would only lose more blood. 

Collapsing to the ground, I clutched my neck, and felt the dampness of the blood that had soaked my clothes. 

The last thing I remembered was 'tousan laughing maniacally as he left me to die. 

*****

"Kakashi..."

I felt weak, and could vaguely see the figure of a fellow Anbu. The smell of medicinal herbs filled my nostrils. My cloth mask was bunched around my neck, and this made breathing easier. 

_Am I dead?_

I struggled to open my eyes, and was greeted by a blurred image of Obito. The left side of my face was numb. 

Bleeding, and obviously badly injured, he appeared to have been taking care of me during the time I had been unconscious. 

"Kakashi? Oh thank God, you're awake!" Obito enveloped me in a bear hug and then whispered in my ear, "I was so worried about you..."

I turned around, and was shocked to see a faint blush cross his face. We had never had such close contact before, and I could almost hear his heart thumping in his chest. 

I brought my hands to what was left of my left eye, but was stopped by a strong hand around my wrist. Obito moved his face even closer to me, and I could feel his breath tickle my skin. 

"Kakashi, I've always wanted to tell you this, but I never really had the chance to... I..." He gulped, and shut his eyes, as if to gather his courage. "I know it sounds soppy but... I... I think I've been in love with you from the first time we met."

I felt my eyes widen in shock, and ignored the pain coming from my overstretched skin. "Obito... I can't say that I share the same sentiments... But," I caressed his cheek and felt its coolness beneath my palm, "I think I could love you right now."

I grinned as Obito shot a confused look at me, and I took this chance to cover his lips with mine, smiling as I kissed him, albeit clumsily at first. 

Obito was all too eager to respond to my hungry mouth, and a battle of tongues ensued. Hands draping over one another's bodies, touching heated skin. Grunting as we explored one another's mouths. Feeling the taste of the other on our own tongue. Relishing the moment when we could taste both ourselves and the other. 

We broke off the kiss, gasping for air. My muscles were screaming in pain, but I was too happy to care. I glanced at Obito, and was horrified to see that he was clutching his side, his face a picture of pain. 

"Obito!" 

"Perhaps we went a little too far..." He winced in pain, and vainly tried to smile.

"What's wrong with you!" I was desperate, and was on the verge of screaming and jumping around wildly. 

"I was poisoned. And I suppose our kiss... sped up my heart rate... The poison has most probably reached my... vital organs..." He offered me a wry smile as I looked on helplessly at him. 

My eyes filled with tears as I clutched his hand. I felt so useless! Here I was, staring at him suffer, and yet, all I could do was to cry and watch him languish in pain. Oh gods, why didn't I ever learn medicine?! Hopelessly, I shut my eyes and prayed to the gods that Obito would be all right. 

Only to find myself on my back on the ground, bound and rendered helpless with his chakra. 

"Gomen ne, Kakashi." Obito struggled to his feet, still clutching his side. "I just wanted to fulfill my last wish."

"What?" I stopped struggling. 

"I would like to continue living, as a part of you..."

Obito moved his hands in a series of seals, and his blood red Sharingan appeared. He moved his hand to his eye. 

"NO! Don't do that!"

But it was too late. He had gouged his Sharingan out, and despite the pain, he staggered towards me, and placed the eye in the gaping socket that was once my eye. He then moved his bloodied hands to produce a medicinal jutsu that would seal his Sharingan into me. 

And all this while, blood was flowing down his cheek in a steady trickle. 

"Obito!" I screamed as his chakra embedded his Sharingan into my eye socket, and heard the sizzle of my skin as my flesh closed up and healed almost perfectly. 

Obito fell to the ground, unconscious, as his chakra prison released me from its grip. 

A/n: Hello. I'm back after my exams. *glares at teachers* Well I guess I pretty much screwed up (again) but that's not really your concern, ne? ^^;; All right. This chapter's extra long, more than 2000 words I think. And it contains the... Ahem.. Kiss between Kakashi and Obito. Should satisfy you yaoi fangirls out there, though I doubt anyone really bothered to read this for... a kiss. That didn't even last long. And it even ended in an anticlimax. XB 

All right. If anyone _ ever_ remembers me and still reads this fic ^^;; I'd like to thank you for being so patient, and yes, I hope you enjoyed reading the chapter ^^ 

Oh yeah. Chapter 11 will be out soon. Within 2 weeks, I hope. 


	12. Chapter 11

**Grey**

**Chapter 11**

I opened my eyes to the glaring rays of the midday sun. Groaning, I shielded my eyes from the light. 

Suddenly remembering the events that had occurred earlier, I sat up abruptly, ignoring the pain in my screaming muscles, and looked around in search of Obito. As my eyes grew accustomed to the light, I was suddenly stricken by a wave of dizziness, and I gripped my temples and whimpered as my chakra levels fell drastically.

My extremities felt cold and numb, and the world swirled before me. It took me a while to realise that my chakra was being directed to my left eye involuntarily. _So... this is how the Sharingan feels like..._

"Obito..." Suppressing my nausea, I reached out to caress his cheek, praying that he was only unconscious and not dead as my eyes filled with tears at the recollection of his selfless deed. 

His skin was ice cold. 

And yet he still looked so serene on the dusty ground, his pale bloodless skin as beautiful as polished ivory. Save for a small trickle of dried blood that ran from the corner of his mouth, and the mangled mess that was once his left eye, he looked as if he were asleep.

Fingering my left cheek gingerly, I felt a clean and smooth scar running down my skin. And where there once was a gaping, bloody hole, there was Obito's Sharingan. 

_Obito... It was just fate that was woven so, just like the threads of you that lie in me..._

Tears rolled out of the corners of my eyes and down my cheeks, leaving clean trails in their wake. I let the tears flow freely, mourning Obito's passing. Men hardened by exposure to death were expected to be cold and emotionless, but surely they were allowed to grieve the loss of a dear friend? 

A solitary teardrop ran off my cheek and onto the ground, mixing with the dust stained rust-red by Obito's blood. At that moment, I was so stricken with sorrow that I was willing to resort to underhand means, if only they could bring him back to life...

Covering my left eye with my forehead protector to minimise chakra loss, I tried to sit up, but failed. My limbs flopped onto the ground, useless. Tears welling up in frustration, I struggled to my feet, and felt an immense sense of helplessness as my knees buckled under my weight. 

My stomach rumbled. How many days had it been since I last tasted food? Three days? Five days? A week? I couldn't say for sure. 

A faint rustling in the bushes some distance away caused warning bells to go off in my head. The barely-audible sounds could have been made by a rabbit, but it could also be made by enemy ninjas stalking us. Or maybe me for that matter, since Obito was dead anyway.

_Damnit!_ I cursed, as I forced myself to my feet, the surge in adrenalin giving me the much-needed strength. My trembling hands reached for a shuriken, but dropped the first two I obtained from the pouch strapped to my right leg. 

I pulled up my torn and soiled mask, and braced myself for an attack, keeping my senses on high alert despite the weariness that threatened to consume me. I wobbled dangerously on my feet as I forgot about the Sharingan and opened my left eye. 

My chakra levels went spiralling downhill, and I dropped the shuriken and fell to the ground, groaning in pain. 

_This is the end. I would surely be killed. _I smiled wryly as I thought to myself. _So much for being part of the Konoha Anbu. _

I heard voices through the haze of discomfort and helplessness, and shut my eyes in anticipation of the blow that would knock me out. 

Wait. Did I hear voices? Ninjas didn't usually talk when they were on missions, especially if it involved killing. Surely they were not my comrades from Konoha? 

My heart leaped in joy at the thought, and the last of my fears vanished as I vaguely heard a voice saying, "That one there on the floor is probably Uchiha Obito. Poor guy, his eye was gouged out."

A voice right next to me reassured me gently, "Kakashi, it's all right. You're safe..."

*****

When I next came to, I was vaguely aware of the sensation of being carried on someone's back. 

I groaned, as the person landed on a bough, and leapt off quickly. The Anbu team seemed to be in a hurry, and I saw that Obito's body was being carried by one of the Anbu. 

I mumbled in a raspy voice, "Anou... Why are we in a hurry?"

The Anbu carrying me turned his head around. "Oh, you've come to, Kakashi." I swore that I could feel him smiling through his mask.

"Well, we have just received orders from the Hokage. Apparently, the Raikage has already launched an attack on our village. And..." He paused here, and gulped. "Have you heard of the legendary Kyuubi no Kitsune?"

I shook my head, and noted that he had said 'Kyuubi' with dread, fear and hate. 

"Well, it's the horrendous chakra demon with nine tails. It is said to be able to destroy whole villages with just a swipe of one of its tails..." His voice trailed off into a whisper.

"Uh, so?", I asked, feeling rather perplexed. What did the Kyuubi no Kitsune have to do with the Raikage attacking our village? 

I swore the man's face turned a shade paler, but it could have been my imagination. His voice, too seemed devoid of life, and if I had to give it a colour, it would have been a deathly shade of grey. 

"There have been reports of the Raikage having signed a pact with the Kyuubi no Kitsune. Apparently, he is able to summon the Kyuubi..."

I gasped, unable to mask my shock. 'Tousan was going to wreck havoc on Konoha! And yet, all this while, I never realised how bloodthirsty and cunning he was, using people as pawns and disposing of them as quickly as he had recruited them. It was impossible that he, my father was such a man! 

I had always remembered him to be a strict disciplinarian who always fussed over routine, self-discipline and self-motivation. And yet despite his usually cold and hard exterior, he did display some paternal love for me occasionally. As a child, it was such affection that outweighed the frequent beatings he gave me. 

However, this illusion was shattered twice when it dawned on me that he wasn't as humane as I had always made him out to be. The anger that welled up in me caused a surge in my chakra levels, and the Anbu carrying me shuddered. 

_If not for him, Obito would most probably be alive now. And I wouldn't be in this rut, switching loyalties all the time. 'Tousan--no, Raikage, I will have my revenge. _

*****

The village that I grew up in was gone, and chaos reigned. Fallen trees and destroyed buildings were all that met the eye. For an instant, I actually doubted my own eyes, and hoped fervently that this was only a cruel illusion created by one of the enemy. 

Ninjas of all ranks were doing their part, evacuating villagers and fighting the ninjas from Hidden Cloud Village. The Anbu carrying me, Dai, passed me to a waiting chuunin, who then proceeded to carry me away from the epicentre of the disaster. 

The ground shook, and many people screamed in response. I was acutely aware of the presence of a tremendous presence of chakra that carried an evil _ki_, and the air was so heavy with fear and the sinister aura that it took a lot of effort for me to lift my head skywards. A foul smelling wind whipped the sand off the ground around us and shook the trees. 

Strangely, our surroundings seemed devoid of any animal life.

A large rust-coloured form filled the darkened sky, and it took a while for me to realise that the horrible creature I beheld was the fearsome Kyuubi. 

I noticed a figure proudly standing atop the monster's head, and realised it was 'tousan upon closer scrutiny. 

Ninjas around me were preparing themselves for battle, armed with only simple weapons and whatever jutsus they knew, every one of them prepared to sacrifice himself to protect the village they loved. I was instantly envious of them, and despite my high and respected rank, I was helpless. Too weak to even stand on my own, I was unable to participate in the fighting. 

It was absolutely unfair! I wanted to solicit my revenge on 'tousan using my own two hands, and not let others take revenge for me. 

A genin close by was giving out army provision pills to other ninjas, and right then I found the answer to my worries. 

Limping pitifully to the genin, I snatched one of the pills from his hands, and waited for the medicine to take effect. Within minutes, I could feel my chakra coursing through my body, and I felt empowered instantly. My knees stopped trembling, and although my left eye was now covered with my forehead protector, my vision cleared significantly. The sense of nausea stemming from my weakness dissipated quickly. 

I felt like I could do battle right then. 

I wrenched my arm out of the chuunin's grasp, and thanked him hurriedly for his kindness. He stared at me in shock, amazed by my tenacity and will.

"Why?" He called after me.

"I must protect the village I love!" I called out over my shoulder, fully aware of the underlying meaning of my words. I was going to go all out for Konoha and completely reject the cause of my homeland. 

I ran off towards the battle scene, my determination to seek revenge driving me forward. 

*****

It was a vain and hopeless battle against the Raikage and his newly-found ally, the Kyuubi no Kitsune. We hardly stood a chance against them, for the Kyuubi, being a chakra demon, kept on supplying the Raikage with more chakra whenever he needed any. It also wrecked havoc on our village, apparently on the Raikage's orders. 

We had been convinced that they were an infallible, until the Kyuubi suddenly appeared to tire of the Raikage, and turned against him, smashing him to the ground with a gigantic foot. 

The Raikage appeared to have died a painless death, and for a moment, I hoped fervently that he had suffered in the moments before he died, to atone for the many hideous crimes he had committed during the forty-odd years he had spent on this earth. 

A thunderous roar interrupted my thoughts, and a cry rang out around me. The Kyuubi, now free of its link with 'tousan, appeared to be free to act of its own will. A smirk tugged at the corners of its large and monstrous mouth, baring its yellow and bloodstained teeth. A cruel wind laced with an evil _ki_ whipped around us, causing fallen leaves to swirl madly around us. In the distance, sturdy buildings fell like matchsticks. 

We were aware that we were mere humans fighting against a formidable enemy, an untouchable demon we were never fated to win. Right now, only a miracle could save us. 

"We must hold out before Yondaime-sama arrives! He will save us all!" Voices around me called out, and others nodded in agreement. 

Ninjas around me continued to launch suicidal attacks on the Kyuubi, and few of those who left survived. The occasional body part fell with sickening thuds onto the ground. 

I looked up, a sense of foreboding coming over me. Gamabunta glowered before the Kyuubi no Kitsune, Hayato-sensei--no the newly appointed Yondaime no Hokage stood proudly atop his head. 

"Yondaime-sama!" The ninjas around me were delighted to see him, and the very sight of him gave us courage. Feeling a sense of responsibility well up in me, I lunged towards the Kyuubi, using trees as stepping stones. Chakra gathered in my hand, and the sound of a thousand birds screaming filled the air. 

As I hung in the air, shimmering blue chakra visible around my fist, I began to wonder about death. Perhaps it isn't as bad as people often make it out to be. Perhaps I'll be transported into paradise... and of course, I'll be able to see Obito again... 

A small triumphant smile tugged at the corners of my mouth, as I opened my mouth in a soundless cry and buried my fist in the Kyuubi¡¯s right foreleg. Much to my surprise, the Kyuubi no Kitsune roared in pain and rage, and I brimmed with satisfaction, even as I began planning my escape. 

The Kyuubi's tails whipped maniacally, stirring up hurricane-velocity winds that howled in my ears. 

Meanwhile, Gamabunta stood his ground, and returned the gesture with several chakra-laden balls of water. The giant globes of water exploded upon contact with the winds, and needle-like raindrops stung our skin. 

Hokage-sama seemed to have realised that the longer we battled the Kyuubi, the greater the damage would be to our village, for he moved his hands quickly in a series of seals, and a blinding light bathed the darkened land. 

A tortured scream resonated in the air, and when the light finally dimmed enough for me to open my eyes, Gamabunta and the Kyuubi no Kitsune were gone. 

*****

It was official. No one was to speak of the Kyuubi no Kitsune. The infant, which served as its vessel, named Uzumaki Naruto, was the child of the late Yondaime no Hokage, the revered hero who had saved our village from certain doom. 

The child lost his mother who had died during childbirth, and hence lived alone, the target of mockery and hatred. The adults hated him, seeing him as the Kyuubi himself, but no one remembered the Yondaime's last words. 

"If not for him, our village would have surely been devastated, even destroyed by the Kyuubi. He is a hero we owe our lives to."

** -end **

A/n: Wait! This isn't the end! There's still an epilogue XD 


	13. Epilogue

**Grey**

**Epilogue**

Hatake Kakashi sat atop a large bough, his nose buried in the notorious R-rated book, _Icha Icha Paradise_. 

A loud scream emitted by a certain pink-haired ninja resonated in the valley. "NARUTO! DON'T LET ME CATCH YOU PEEPING AGAIN!!" 

"But... Sakura-chan..." 

Kakashi looked up from his book, and stared at the cause of the commotion with his signature nonchalant look. He smiled through his mask, and sighed. The Yondaime's son had grown to become an energetic and hyperactive teenager, who shared his love for cup ramen. 

Mumbling to himself, he thought to himself, "Perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to take them to bathe here. But then I thought it would have been such a waste--the waterfall's lovely."

Looking away from the squabbling pair, Kakashi trained his eyes on the third member of his team. The dark haired boy who had captured the hearts of many girls his age, Uchiha Sasuke, brought back memories of old. 

The only girl in the team, clad in a bathing suit, blushed to the roots as Sasuke looked in her direction. The blonde boy protested but could only look on jealously and made a series of faces at the Uchiha boy. 

Kakashi smiled, used to such situations, and buried his nose in his dirty book once more. 

_And the will of the fire will continue to burn for generations to come..._

A/n: Wow! Complete at last! (No, actually I finished writing this in August, but I had other things to contend with so the editing had to wait.) It's been a pleasure to write a fic on my favourite character Hatake Kakashi, and even more so that I am able to share it with all you people here. Thanks going out to all readers, and Kishimoto Masashi for creating the drool-worthy ninja ^^;;

Not forgetting our wonderful beta-readers kakashi and Hannshuin, and my talented partner yume, who agreed to let me archive this on FanFiction.Net. Love you all lots. ^^ 

Oh, and since this fic was part of a project, the entire fic, plus illustrations, is also archived at grey.imess.net . Do go there and drop a hi on our tagboard. ^^;; 

Well, ja for now and hope to be seeing you people soon. 


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